Sex-Positivity Means Unlearning Shame

For years, I believed that something was wrong with me for being curious about sex for pleasure. I felt wrong for fantasizing about being sexually intimate with someone. I saw sex as something strange and dangerous, not just for the physical risks it posed to the body, but for how quickly it could lower one’s social worth. So, I suppressed my sexual desires. I learned to be ashamed of them.

Boy can I relate to those words. I grew up with a heteronormative and religious view of sex, so there’s never been a shortage of shame to feel over having sex, talking about sex, or even thinking about sex. I grew up hating that I had sexual desire at all.

Thankfully, that era of my life is over and I’ve embraced sex-positivity. Consensual sex is a positive thing, and I celebrate it as the beautiful human experience it is.